Sunday, June 19, 2011

Sister Fitch: June 14th, 2011

Hello all!!
What a weeeeeek!!  What Mark said about days being endless and weeks being brief is so true.  I can't BELIEVE its already p-day again, but my body and my mind are grateful.  We don't exactly stick to the schedule as its laid out for us on p-day...hope its not too grevious of a sin.  We come to the laundry room before 6 because the later it gets, the more missionaries are here, and the less likely you are to snag a machine.  This way, we each get TWO machines and can do ALL our laundry in under an hour...chouette.  Then we get a sack breakfast and go back to the Res, shower, get ready for the temple, and oh glorious of glorious things we go to the temple.  Definately the highlight of the week.  Or at least one of them.  Devotionals are pretty great.  I love singing in the choir at those.  Sunday, for relief society, we had Ann Dibb come speak to us.  I had no idea her dad is Thomas S. Monson!!  Somehow that has escaped me til now.  She gave a wonderful talk, then spent about twenty minutes just talking about her dad.  Did you know he loves Perry Mason?  And that he raises pigeons?  And many other wonderfully human things that we don't get to see.  It was really great. 
I think it was Thursday that I had probably my hardest day yet.  It was one of those days when nothing in particular went wrong, but somehow I was reeeeeally emotional.  Maybe it was just hormonal...anyway, whatever it was, I was feeling really withdrawn, and really weak.  Not physically, but definately emotionally and spiritually.  I felt like someone was shining a spotlight on all of my weaknesses, on everything I haven't faced or dealt with emotionally yet (in EVERY aspect of my life) and that all of my strengths were tucked away in some dark drawer for the day.  I hit my knees several times that day.  Well, I do everyday, such is the nature of being a missionary, but I hit them a little harder that day.  It's hard having a companion sometimes--particularly when you want to sneak off into some grove of trees somewhere and cry and pour your heart out to Heavenly Father.  Well, the MTC is a bit like a COMPOUND.  No one comes in, no one goes out without permission.  Plus, it freaks me out not to have my companion anyway.  I found a moment in the Res when I could be alone in the hallway, and prayed and praaaaayed and prayed.  No epiphanies (sp?).  No bolts of lightening (which comes BEFORE thunder, Sam).  Just...peace.  As the day progressed, the epiphanies came, the spotlight became more of a highlight and I could see what I needed to change and what attitudes needed to be tweaked.  This is the deal with the MTC--there's no such thing as an easy day, and there's no such thing as a bad day.  There are HARD days, and there are smooth days.  C'est tout.  Smooth days are...well...not the norm.  But there is no such thing as a bad day.  If you have a bad day here, you are MISSING something.  You aren't learning some lesson that is trying to be taught to you. 
So, a virus broke out at BYU and they are super duper paranoid about it coming to the MTC so no one is allowed to shake hands or hug.  In other words, NO HUMAN CONTACT.  Well, it was hard enough when it was restricted to just a handshake and hugs from the branch presidency wives.  I don't like no human contact.  It's pretty rough.  I think when I get home I'm going to be a hug maniac..."oh look, a person!"  **HUG**.  No one will be safe.
Our Branch Pres (pres Robinson, Mark) was released this sunday.  It was a surprise to me, I had no idea!  He and his wife have been wonderful.  We'll miss them.  His replacement is President Zimmelman (sp?) and I haven't had much chance to get to know him, but we've been assured that he will be wonderful. 
Quoi d'autre?  I think we're all at the point here where the overwhelming newness of the MTC has worn off and we've started to slow down.  I'm working on ways to re-inspire everyone to be focused and remember our time is short and we can't waste any of it.  Any ideas? 
I LOVE being a missionary.  I LOVE my teachers, I love my district, I love my branch, I love french, I love the gospel, I love my Heavenly Father and the fact that he has trusted me with this huge responsibility to bring the world his truth.  The gravity of that call is really starting to set in, and while its a little unnerving, mostly it is just inspiring.  My favorite song right now is How Firm a Foundation.  Read the words.  We watced motab sing it at music and the spoken word and it was....TRIUMPHANT.  (and eh?)

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